Instant Gratification vs. Selling Your Value

Instant Gratification?

I have been working with a client for the last 6 weeks in up-leveling everything from packaging to pricing. She is a very talented coach who was using pricing that worked. Her entire business and reputation was set on this pricing. It was comfortable and safe to offer it. So messing with pricing was sensitive but she knew at her core truth that she was providing more value. To help her get comfortable we practiced role playing sales calls and objections in advance and even did a ROI on her services based on some amazing company testimonials she has gotten.

BUT then I got this call “Hey I had a new client call me and want my course. I told them a $X,000 price… and they had to take it to management for approval. If I would have charged my old price they would have probably signed on the spot because she can approve up to my old price”.

It was at that moment that it hit me that most people don’t up-level and charge their value because they desperately need the instant gratification of the immediate sale or positive feedback. When you don’t get that positive shot in the arm when you put yourself out there vulnerably to a client, you feel like you did something wrong. So I mentioned that to her that maybe she is going to get the higher price tomorrow and she shouldn’t let her need for instant gratification cloud the interaction… she quickly responded “OMG – that is the story of what I am doing everywhere in my life from the ice cream I want to eat when I am sad to the happiness I desire in my relationship”.

Instant gratification is the desire to experience pleasure or fulfillment without delay or deferment. Basically, it’s when you want it; and you want it now.

That really had me sit and ponder our deep need for instant gratification as a society. We get our food in minutes, we google and see our photos in seconds… it’s something we all need to swim up stream against when we experience discomfort. If we don’t challenge our desire for instant gratification, we hamper our personal development because we want only to do what we know will get immediate favorable feedback. It’s in the discomfort space that we learn the greatest gifts about ourselves & others… and hold space for it to unfold and grow perfectly.

As a sales person that can see 18 month long sales cycles, I have learned to find the adrenaline in the tiny steps of the process. I truly enjoy the dance and relationship that forms over that time. Would I take a yes and dotted line at month 3 – HECK YES, I AM HUMAN! But when I savor in the tiny steps, I also learn more on how to create a bigger win/win for both sides as part of the deal.

SO what tiny step in your up-level process are you appreciating today?

Creating your lifestyle

….is actually ALOT like creating a new business.  So many of the same issues came up for me.

A year ago I vowed not dread and waste my 40th year worrying about my chronological age. I wrote down all the things I wanted to be loud and proud as the clock turned to a number with a zero on the end.  Two things were nagging me… I wanted to FEEL “young” and I wanted to do share my PASSION of self discovery and health.

Decision Point.  In September of last year I had stubborn baby weight to lose. I had tried every diet and started every Monday of the last year promising a new me and clean eating.  I tried some Beachbody, then I went Paleo, next up books by fitness competitors on macros and iifym….  You get the point.

During a Halloween wine night with the girls, a friend and I decided to sign up for a race together to motivate ourselves.  The distraction of training for a race in 6 months was what the doctor ordered and I decided to just focus on the next 30 days.  Imperfect Action.  I just needed to move and make the best food & movement choices I could one a time and I would worry about what label my lifestyle had later.

I am a very goal oriented individual but those 30 days had A LOT of falling off the wagon.  There were so many of my eating and drinking habits that were just that…  Mindless habits.  I had to own those as my choices and who I am to move around some big excuses and themes that I had.  Own who I am.

I went to a local gym that offered group training and made appointments and commitments to others on when I was showing up.  COMMUNITY.  With all the work life balance challenges I had – it was crucial for me to look someone in the eyes and own my excuse for not doing what I said I would.  Plus my personal currency is people!!  So soon I was doing things like getting up at 5am to meet a friend at run group and competing with myself upping the weight on exercises I couldn’t even do when I started.

With 6 months down and my strength and determination adding new tiny habits monthly, I turned my focus to my passion.  I love to read and I love personal development and health.  What to do with that as a sales person??  Many voices in my head told me I am not a nutritionist or a teacher.  However, with all the changes in healthcare, people were asking me questions.  How do I meal prep?  What diet am I on? Can I share this recipe?  So many of us want more health and vitality while still living a lifestyle we want. Then I remembered those same voices told me I couldn’t achieve what was doing in health either because they were afraid to keep failing.  So I didn’t fix what wasn’t broken.  I followed the exact SAME model to launch my passion as I did my health.  I got an amazing coach and became part of a special community of people who were building businesses for their passion and I followed the same steps….  Decision Point.  Imperfect Action.  Own who I am.  Participate in the Community.

And here we are today…. Happy 40th birthday Amy and Happy birth day to The Entrepreneur Diet.  The Entrepreneur Diet is about leveraging one’s personality type and lifestyle to create habits that lead to a healthier you.  Diets are as individual as haircuts.  They change as we change and we can’t just always pick something out of a magazine and have it work for us.

I am not quite sure where my passion will lead me over the next year but I know I love it and I’ll talk about it and do it no matter what.  (sorry to my friends and family that get my unsolicited opinion haha)  And just like I didn’t know last year that my jeans wouldn’t fit this year due to some new muscle… I know the outcome is going to be just what it is suppose to be.  Right now I am building a new muscle which is taking a stand for what I love and being ok with that is going to attract as much negative feedback as positive.  Almost as much fear as trying to run a half marathon is 2:15 for me..but I did that too.  So again my lifestyle is an example of a possibility for my passion.

My site is up and has email list on it if you are interested in following along and creating a community that supports others in their health and lifestyle.  Today my birthday wish is that everyone is supported in their own way of taking care of their body and health and to another amazing year!!

UPDATE:  Doing the action of the Entrepreneur Diet helped me see what I loved with working with individuals and what I am good at.  It was again some imperfect action as I have transitioned into a strategy consultant for those businesses who are up leveling.  The site has transitioned to amyburford.com.  I have learned SO MUCH from not sitting on the sidelines and doing a little failure.  Would love to hear how you have done the same on your journey!

Discipline and Self Confidence

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I had quite a few people write emails, texts, or calls asking about my son’s week at military camp so I thought I would write it out today.  Almost every time I told someone where I left him… I got two questions… is he ok?  Are you having trouble with him?

When I was growing up in a small town, it was an “it takes a village lifestyle”.  I had multiple adults who would call me out on my behavior.  I also was very fortunate to have some amazing coaches in sports that pushed me out of my comfort zone a little bit each year to help me grow.  I was never the best at any of the sports and that didn’t matter.  My coaches knew what I was capable of and expected me to do better.

So what does that have to do with sending my kid to military academy??  Well today we don’t have a village and some of the coaches are just happy for the kids that do show up on the field and don’t get after them to try.  Some teachers allow him to hand in homework 2 days after it was due and we don’t get letter grades until 6th grade!  In my opinion, my kid was taking the path of least resistance and only doing what came easy or what he wanted to do.  That just isn’t life.

So this spring I provided him with 2 questions.  What is your dream experience and what is a camp you want to do this summer?   He chose game design and paintball so the rest was up to me to give him those while pushing him out of his comfort zone and showing him all the things he was capable of that his mind said he can’t do.

Dropping him off was overwhelming.  The campus was gorgeous (St Johns Northwestern Military Academy) but I got the schedule and they were waking up my baby at 6:30am for 30 minutes of exercise at 6:45am.  OH BOY…he is going to love me for that one.  The next item on the schedule that made my stomach turn…. High ropes course and drownproofing.  So in one day they had him try to fall from heights and then drown himself.  How was I going to leave him??  We picked up his uniforms (fatigues and athletic both were included) and had him change and meet the roommate.  The look on his face at that moment I didn’t want to leave.  Whoa… maybe part of not pushing him out of his comfort zone was ME.  So big hug and off we go.

Each day SJNMA posts pictures on a website by activity for the parents to see what the boys are doing.  I’m not going to lie, until the first pictures were up I was going a bit nutty.  How did he make the first run?  Did he sleep?  Is he homesick?  Then the first two were posted!!!  Swimming evals and a camp challenge run… NO smiles and a pic of him all out running.  I had to break down and send an email even though I had strict directions from him not to 😮

So in 6 days he did the following:

Camp Challenge Run

Archery

Marksmanship

Drownproofing

Rappel Tower

Laser Tag

Lake Fun

Paintball

High Ropes

Scuba

The last day I finally got the smile on his face I was looking for in the pics and we were at graduation an hour early.  My heart skipped a beat and it was emotional to see him as he marched around the campus in uniform with his company to the chapel where graduation was happening.  He didn’t break a look and he was marching in a line.  WHOA – is that my kid?  His platoon won many awards including best at keeping their room clean.  WHOA –is that my kid??

The first thing he did after graduation was grab his little sister and they didn’t let go of each other for 20 minutes.  Filled my soul and heart to see him provide such respect to the teachers and love to his family at the same time.  First thing he said to us about the week…. Paintballs really hurt mom.  HAHA.  Son sometimes our dream experiences are different than what we think they will be :)  He said it felt like I was there because they checked all his bruises every night from it.  Whew… good for moms to know 😉

He seemed so much older as we listened to him say how he had to put on full uniform while in the pool and not drown.  He told us about the team building activities and how he was not sure he had conquered his fear of heights yet but he did every exercise every time.  The surprise of the week, he is good at archery… he scored of 42 the first time and the winner scored 45.  Hardest things about the week… he said there was one teacher that pushed them harder but the most difficult was having 10 minutes to clean your room, shower, brush your teeth in the morning and be ready for room inspection.  He realizes how slow he moves in the morning!! :)  He said he was mostly homesick when someone was pushing him past what he wanted to do and when he was scared.  But the verdict…he wants to go back next year because he will be 12 and able to participate in the hunter safety course and there are few things he wants to practice.  Ahh… success…. The desire and thought on working at something to get better.

So no I didn’t send my son to military camp for discipline or fear… I sent him so he would get out of his own way and realize underneath the boy that only does what’s comfortable is a growing man who is capable of anything he sets his mind to.

Multiple Personalities

It’s has been YEARS since I wrote a blog post and I pick a title like multiple personalities… hmmmm… maybe I was kidnapped by a personality that doesn’t like to express and now I am back?? 

Actually, no.  I was working with my coach and sharing my experience of an interaction with a friend that ended poorly.  Her feedback was around how I showed up as someone that friend had not experienced before and why it didn’t work.  When looking for evidence of this I was reading a lot of blogs of authors I admire…. thought of my blogging and why I didn’t blog anymore.  When I looked at the answer it was because I accomplished what I was blogging about as Fitness Amy.  I ran a half marathon and I got my fitness back post baby.  I had made the blog only about the Fit Amy.  OMG, the same morale of the story twice in one day!  That’s a sign in my book!

The diagnosis === I have multiple personalities.  I have Sales Amy.  Spiritual Amy.  Personal Development Amy.  Hometown Amy.  Mom Amy.  Lazy Amy.  Fitness Amy…etc.  I am great at knowing which one to apply to what situation and to what person.  However, not only am I working to grow in this area but as I am on the eve of my 40th year celebration, I realized what I want is to integrate the Amy’s into one.  No more outfit changes.  I want to be in my skin and be ALL of me ALL the time.  This blog is the first step.  There is a lot more to me than fitness and what I am passionate about.  I didn’t blog for traffic but for therapy and accountability so what a perfect place to start with my new focus on putting ALL of Amy out there.

I come from a very small town where I have an ingrained obsession with what people think.  As I left and got older, I thought I didn’t care what people think but looking at the reason behind the multiple Amy’s … I realize that I may not care and get hurt by those that don’t agree or like me… but it still matters to me.  So in the theme of getting me out there I am going to share 10 things that cross the Amy personalities that I like to keep separate 😀  What’s your top 10 and do you hide certain ones from certain people??

Amy’s Hidden Top 10  :)

1.  I broke my hand at a personal development seminar while breaking a cinder block and trying to crush my fear of failure.

2.  The best and worst thing that has ever happened to me is losing all my financial means and house and needing to close my business.  The utter failure I felt was massive but the lessons and gifts it brought is priceless.

3.  I love people.  They are my currency and that is why I always show up as the Amy that helps me connect to them.

4.  Divorce taught me more about a successful marriage than I ever dreamed and I wouldn’t change it for the world.

5.  As both a kid and an adult, I love magic and Greek Mythology.  Can we say I Dream Of Jeannie meets Harry Potter/Percy Jackson lover 😮

6.  I have moved around in my jobs…some for good reason and some for not so good.  Wouldn’t change a thing… my network and people I met in each place were for a reason.

7.  I hate to work out by myself.  I find the best in me in a group setting or with a trainer.  I need the competition and someone to quiet the monkey in my mind that keeps telling me to stop.

8.  I drink green water (It’s chlorophyll).  People have called it my pond scum that I work with.  I believe in the alkaline/acid balance is a secret to good health.  One of the gifts of starting a degree in nutrition before the school closed.

9.  I don’t expect others to invest in me what I wouldn’t.  I have attended a dozen personal development courses.  I read 2 books a month and I have a coach.  I believe if you aren’t growing – you are dying.

10.  I have written atleast 4 outlines for ebooks in the last year and I hope this exercise in blogging gives me the confidence to move forward in putting one of them out there.

 

 

Beating the cravings….

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Not gonna lie, there were a few times this week where I wanted to binge and then just go back and try again.  I got my headache from cutting the carbs by day 2-3 and it was fierce.  Nothing a bag of chips couldn’t fix or Jimmy Johns!  But I quite frankly didn’t want to end of with it again so I stayed on task.  One thing I didn’t do was watch my portions at all this week.  I know I gained and I ate too much because I can feel it.  But hey… giving up bad carbs was hard enough… I didn’t want to feel hungry and deprived too.

This week my dreams of bread are gone.  My problem is 2pm…. I want sweets and/or a Vanilla Latte.  Haven’t caved except for Saturday night we had an anniversary dinner and I had wine and cheese.  Oh to die for!  It only comes once a year 😉  I got right back on and didn’t let it be an excuse to eat bad again Sunday so I was happy with myself.

Things are quite right yet with a Paleo approach.  I like what a friend did in her blog …. she called it Primeo.  It takes the best of a couple approaches and combines it.  She is eating the healthy items that you don’t find in a traditional paleo and eating them on the weekends.  I find a 80/20 approach to anything is my key to success so I am stealing her recipes and thinking it’s a great idea!!

Well I had to check this off my list of things I was suppose to do yesterday…. now I need to check off going to bed and getting some sleep!!  As you can see the days are packed and I even had Ava in my vlog… and no comment about my weary look today :)

Cheers,

I need friends….

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Ava 3 wks and Grant 9 yrs have been awesome distractions….

I am 12 weeks postpartum and haven’t really taken any steps to get back into my clothes yet.  I have been blessed with losing faster than my last pregnancy but no go on getting back into any of my work clothes yet and I am TIRED of the same 5 outfits!!!!  So as I evaluated things my first 3 weeks back to work, I realized I am just a person that needs help from others on my weight or fitness journey.  Whether it be jumping into the latest craze and trying it because of a blog I read or having a trainer tell me I can’t stop, I have always been most successful at reaching my goals with others!  So BACK TO THE BLOGGING COMMUNITY I GO!!

Only a short 3 min video below because I am short on time.  Some big changes since my days of running!

1.  I have a infant… meaning a little less sleep and time I want to spend seeing her

2.  I don’t have a trainer…. gotta find a video, class, blog, or something that replaces the voice in my head.  Can’t help it… just how I get the best results

3.  I commute…. the job I got last year takes an hour to commute 4 days a week.  So my favorite 10am working out doesn’t fit and I lose 2+ hours in the car each day.

4.  I am really starting over… Yep I have run 13 miles before and probably can’t do 1 now.  That’s a hard pill for the ego when trying to get back into it.

So I am in the midst of figuring out how to the change my goals and workouts based on the above points.  And in the meantime I started the paleo 30 days challenge with a girl in my neighborhood.  I am turning in food logs etc.  Had CRAZY headaches already in my 2nd day so I know the toxins are exiting and hope they give me back 1/8 of an inch LOL.  I am really pushing the water to get through the cravings and headaches.  And yes I am on day 3 of black coffee (blah).

Well I am off to the commute… it has taken me 3 days to get this up so goal next week – do it in 1 :)

Cheers!

Ch-ch-Ch CHANGES….

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Ch-Ch-Ch-Changes…. Man can I hear that song in my head when I write that.  Whoa how they came fast and furious in the 2nd half of 2011.  People that I keep in touch with often say that I have “so much going on”… well as of July and on…even I couldn’t keep up with the pace that life brought to me.  So I started 2012 with a new hair color and a sign of the changes I would choose to bring into 2012.

One of the largest transitions was losing my job in July of last year.  I was ever so grateful to find a new one by September but I didn’t even slow down to understand some of the new habits that needed to come with it.  I was moving from 4+ years of working out of my home and I went to a 1hr+ daily commute to the office.  WHOA!!!  I lost being able to do laundry during the week, my middle of the day workout time, my ability to work in sweats, my lunch hour to do twitter and blog… AND I COULD GO ON AND ON!!  LOTS of other change news in the youtube video below 😉 So now that I have got use to some of these changes, I am looking forward at how to make it a great 2012.

First one I am concentrating on this week is food planning…. tomorrow is list writing and meal and snack planning.  Jump back next week and hold me accountable to how I do :)

Rock N Roll Chicago Recap

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HERE WE ARE – at the finish line and with medals… and smiles 😉

This race was more of a mental surprise than a physical one.  Not gonna lie… I was pretty scared at 4:30am on Sunday morning wondering when I might need to force myself to finish.  Happily I am here to report that I thoroughly enjoyed the race and was HAPPY up through mile 8.  After that I have to give some HUGE props to one of the race sponsors – XSport Fitness.  They had teams of 6-8 people at each mile all dressed up in rocker gear and extremely energetic to cheer us on!  Coming into mile 9 I was slowing down and doing some walking and the team was so fired up that it was contagious and got me through another mile.  PURE AWESOME!  Thank you XSport!  I am proud to say I am a happier member of your gym now!

The wheels came off my bus totally just before mile 12.  We were in the Bears tailgating parking lot and I was dreaming of sitting on a chair and having a beer instead of trying to make my legs keep moving.  Pretty much every part hurt by then.  A total and complete stranger stopped and asked me my name… then proceeded to say her name was Sue and she was going to help me breathe in strength and exhale fatique for the next 10-15 minutes.  WOW.  Truly took my mind off how bad my feet wanted to cramp… my knees felt like they had been hit by a baseball bat… and I was soaking wet as it had started to rain.  Sue – if anyone knows you – YOU ARE MY ANGEL!

So with all that drama I crossed the finish line at 2:30.  I made it out there!  Which is more than Bret Michaels :( who cancelled his appearance last minute.  LOL… And 10 minutes off what I have done in my last two.  I was thrilled that I had that finish and reminded myself once again – when the heck am I going to start take training for these things more seriously!  Rock N Roll Vegas is December 4th… I do have a chance to redeem myself….

But on to the more fun part of the recap is my amazing shopping finds at the Expo!  I show case them here in my vlog and I must say I have not taken off these new Zoot shoes in 4 days – AMAZING!!  I mean a girl has to have a reason to run 13.1 miles… I can’t think of a better one that some cute new finds 😉

Ready or Not… Here I RUN!

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Oh… you know how when you haven’t golfed for awhile sometimes you hit your best holes because you aren’t trying to kill the ball or swing too hard… well do you think that is true for running?  :)  well let’s hope so because as I explain it seems before every race I feel like I didn’t do enough and this time – ANY running in the last month.  Life caught me and gave me a big dose and now I am just determined to stick with being a runner and give myself a finish no matter the time.

 

Loving my new goodies from the Competitor Group above for racing.  They were really a turning point in my running preparation mentally this week as I talk about in the video.  WELL… gotta run and go pick up the girls to head to the Expo and shop.  CROSS your fingers and toes for me about 8am tomorrow morning which is when my first “Why the hell am I doing this” will probably kick in.

 

Progress Pics

Today my CrossFit Challenge went to 9 sets and we are almost the end of teaching Amy how to do big girl push ups and building some lats.  So I thought I would take the opportunity to celebrate the progress and also look back to an old photo where I weighed the same (pre-baby even) and realize how much I have changed my body and mind without changing the scale.  Yes I even gave you a glimpse of said picture in this video.  This picture was 10 years old and I have made most of my changes in the past 4-5 years on diet and increasing my water intake.  But man when I look back at how much happier and stronger I feel – I wanted to remind myself and others that the number on the scale and the abs are not the thing to focus on – it’s the health.  And one of my favorite quotes of all time right now is You can not have a happy ending with an unhappy journey.  And I am enjoying the process and the fun of trying new things and seeing what works in my life and what doesn’t.  It’s all just part of the process… and progress 😉